Insecure

qwaszx • 10 January 2012 at 5:14 PM

I feel insecure about myself.

I was recently diagnosed with a rare allergy/asthma to a type of dust. One of the "cures" is a medication with many side affects.

The side affects that happen to me were, tierdness, hunger, mixed up emotions and weight-gain. Before ai started the medication, I was underweight because of my allergies to egg, milk and nuts. Now I have gained 15 pounds, which is a lot for me.

I went back to school for the first time in two weeks today. When I walked into a classroom, late, everyone started whispering. About half-way through the class, I got up to look at a book. I was flipping through the index for pottery when I heard laughter behind me. I looked up and a boy at the table in front of me was laughing with the other kids at his table. I asked him what was so funny and he ignored me. I later heard him whisper "Audrey's face is sooo big!"

Later in math, 4 people pointed out that my cheeks were puffy, my face was rounder, I looked like a chipmuch, it looked like I had mushrooms in my mouth, ect.
They really helped. *sarcasm* T.T

I'm really stressed and my emotions are on a roller coaster ride while my sensible side went to Florida. :/

I just needed to tell someone, even if I don't know them.

orange • 10 January 2012 at 5:16 PM

@qwaszx
FEEL BETTER!😋

rawrcookies08 • 10 January 2012 at 5:22 PM

@qwaszx Well they're just stupid. Tell them to go get asthma and to have a nice day, and you'll see them when their faces are bigger than yours. (Jk haha) 😋

GET BETTER! OR I WILL MAKE YOU EAT A BUNCH OF DELICIOUS COOKIES! (Maybe that's not such a good punishment...) Lol

qwaszx • 10 January 2012 at 5:27 PM

@orange Thanks!😸
@rawrcookies08 One kid seems really interested in my beeswax.
Him: Where were you all this time?
Me: Why do you want to know?
Him: ... Hey Nic!
XD Another time...
Him: You were in the hospital for a long time then!
Me: Yes and there is something you do after called recover.
😋

lily- • 10 January 2012 at 5:32 PM

@qwaszx
Hope you're alright, and don't worry about what people say, just ignore them, they're worse of then you for laughing and pointing etc.

rawrcookies08 • 10 January 2012 at 5:35 PM

@qwaszx Lol

whitefall • 10 January 2012 at 5:45 PM

Well, they probably don't know why.
So, give em a piece of your mind. ;]

qwaszx • 10 January 2012 at 5:46 PM

@lily- Yeah... :/ The kids in my grade are jerks. >.<

pizza5pizza5 • 10 January 2012 at 5:58 PM

STUPID freaking BOYS -_-

leopardclaws • 10 January 2012 at 6:22 PM

That's so rude! Things like this are appalling! Just stick with your friends 😊. They'll understand and be supportive, friends like you for who you are not what you look like, 😊.

morgana • 10 January 2012 at 6:29 PM

@qwaszx
My guess for reason they were saying that was, as you pointed out, you use to be underweight before you took the medication. They are most likely just not use to you looking healthier because you use to weigh less. It really doesn't mean your fat or anything. Just fuller then they remember you being.
Still of course that is no excuse for them to be so rude about it.
Fell better! 😊

briseis • 10 January 2012 at 6:34 PM

People will find anything to make fun of. The thing I would advise you to do is not just ignore it but accept it and join in with their laughter. There's nothing better than pissing off someone who was trying to [yeep] you off.

Just because you look different doesn't mean it's a bad thing. Everyone looks different, so it always baffles me as to why people tease one another when no one looks the same.

zafeyry • 10 January 2012 at 6:37 PM

@qwaszx
Tell them "because being in the hospital's something to laugh about." They'll shut up, and try to really sell the hospital thing.

qwaszx • 10 January 2012 at 7:00 PM

@zafeyry That's a good one, I'll use it. XD
@briseis I tried. -.- They looked at me like I was an idiot. D:
@morgana And all the fat is going to go away when I get off the medication, thankfully.😊
@leopardclaws That's the problem... My friends are jerks. XD
@pizza5pizza5 Exactly! 😊 (No offense to the 0.000000001% of nice guys out there😋)
@whitefall I'm not really blaming them, they didn't know until I told them... :/

briseis • 10 January 2012 at 7:49 PM

@qwaszx how old are you, and what grade are you in?

cafe • 10 January 2012 at 8:11 PM

@Qwaszx

I know how you feel, I have stomach spasms, but at the time we didn't know that. I was misdiagnosed with Stomach migraines, basically it's cousin. My medicine made me go from 118 to 140 in only a few weeks, so I have large stretch marks and am still overweight - My ankle won't let me work out a lot.

My advice is ignore them. If they're low enough to laugh at someone who looks how they look, because of something they can not control, they're dirt.

You're beautiful just the way you are. Because you're a kind, sweet person and they can =censor= off.

qwaszx • 10 January 2012 at 8:27 PM

@brileis I'm 11 and I'm in 6th grade.😊

@cafe It feels like no one knows how I feel. D: Only 10% of people who have asthma get this. :/
I don't see why I care what they think, but I do. I just wish I could be accepted for who I am.
I hate how they can judge me and effect me, when they don't know what it's like.☹️

cafe • 10 January 2012 at 8:29 PM

I know how you feel, I've had my wisdom teeth removed at 14, stomach spasms where I threw up almost every day, and ankle surgery this year.


And you know what?

They can suck my big toe.

If you ever wanna talk, just PM me; But I have to get off in a little bit. Though I will reply sooner or later

Deleted • 10 January 2012 at 8:39 PM

@qwaszx the hospital is a place where they heal people yet kill people. They think they have answers, but they don't. People think, "oh you went to the hospital, yet you look like a train-wreck. What'd you do to yourself!?"
They.
Just.
Don't
Get
IT.
For your health I prescribe some extra water and a few short walks if you're alive. Way because it'll keep you from getting bloated(your face might be because of slight bloating. Trust me. My face is bloated as we speak.) the walks will help keep your chest clear.
For the classmates-
I have realized nothing people ever say helps. What people might say:
Ignore it.
Tell em off.
Tell a teacher.
But NOBODY ever knows what really works. I suggest just let it all out. At home. Just let it all out. When nobody's around, just vent it all. Vent it here. Like now, just say what you need to get out. But Unless you vent it out to somebody in person, your roller coaster is going to get taller and faster. I can't give anymore "advice"
That's because I'm an emotional wreck too, I just can't get it out to anyone besides on here. Once it's out in the open though, it can't be taken back. No more secrets.
Usually that happens too late.
Recently somebody in my community committed suicide by jumping in front of a bus. People bullied her WHILE she was DYING in the hospital. OBVIOUSLY, she had NOBODY to listen to her.
You can only take so freaking much! Why can NOBODY realize that!?!?

balletninja • 10 January 2012 at 8:57 PM

I can be like that. I sometimes talk about people after something physical has happened.

But I always understand I only see one side of the story.
I always keep that in mind, and I try my hardest not to judge.

I am not trying to be a saint. At some point everyone has judged based on physical aspects, it is inevitable. People are just going to do it, it cannot be helped so I just take it.

I also don't tell counselors or teachers. A girl bullied me in third grade. It wasn't that bad at all, but back then I thought it was sorta important. Well, her friends and my friends started to hate me because I turned her in for being mean then things just went downhill. The counselor made it very public, and that didn't help me at all.

It is part of living, people judge. For good and bad. We just have to deal with it.

qwaszx • 10 January 2012 at 9:06 PM

@iridescent Yeah.☹️ The more I ignore them, Tge more they do it.
@Balletninja My school is always like "It's not tattling!" or "Don't be afraid to stand up for yourself!" But when you do, they say "Okay." and never do anything! Dx *headdesk*

akira • 10 January 2012 at 9:06 PM

@qwaszx

I'm in 6th grade too! xD

Back to topic;

All I can say is well I'm overweight. I didn't used to be, people in my grade spread rumors BAD rumors. I don't think I have actual asthma, but a doctor told me that I will have it one day (I dunno why xP) so Hope You feel better 😊

balletninja • 10 January 2012 at 9:10 PM

Bullying can't be stopped as a whole. Just ignored. 😊

qwaszx • 10 January 2012 at 9:16 PM

@akira Thanks 😉
@Balletninja *sigh* I wish it could though, but that's not gonna happen.😋

cafe • 10 January 2012 at 9:31 PM

@balletninja


I judge based on looks, but I'm kinda opposite
If I see someone who looks different [Like, in a wheel chair] I feel pity and try and help them. It could go either good, or bad