"You said something encouraging positive body image, you must be a fat girl."

metaphor • 28 January 2012 at 2:01 AM

Why do I always see this?
Every time, often in online forums, someone will tell someone feeling down that they shouldn't be so hard on themselves because everyone is beautiful in their own way, etc.

Then, of course, someone has to come along and say something like, "lol, you say that cuz ur fat."

Uh, what? So encouraging people to accept themselves suddenly means that you yourself must be an ogre now? But anyway, even if the person is fat...so? As long as they aren't crippling obese, what's so bad about liking yourself for who you are?

This is coming from someone with terrible body image, who is trying to lose weight and feels like she's failing miserably and just getting fatter even though she has dropped sizes. I don't find myself pretty or even mildly attractive, tbh, there I'm admitting it. But I encourage other people to embrace themselves, no matter how much they weigh or whatever.

And also, telling fat people to love themselves =/= encouraging obesity/unhealthy lifestyle.

Here is another argument that really gets on my nerves.

So if you're fat, even if you don't thrive off donuts and you choose healthy foods and stay active, you must be delusional if you find yourself attractive? If others find you attractive, they must be horrble people? lolwut?

Yeah, I'm bitter. Yeah, I'm insecure. What are you going to do about it?

cafe • 28 January 2012 at 2:11 AM

@Metaphor

They, my friend, can suck my big toe. I'm chubby, gained weight from medicine, and am slowly losing it with exercise. Just because someone encourages people doesn't mean they're automatically fat.

To me, as long as you're healthy or trying to get healthy, you're beautiful. You can be stick skinny, but if you're healthy you're beautiful to me. Same with someone who's larger.

That's like saying that since I support gay people, I must be gay [I wore a gay pride sure about a year ago, can't remember what it said - something about it's none of your business if people love each other with a rainbow over it] so people asked me if I way gay.

Again I say, to me Healthy = Beautiful.

If someone's obese, on a scooter, ordering mcdonalds - I feel bad for them. I pity them. They're not helping themselves.
But, if you work out, if you can walk up stares without getting winded because you're really out of shape - then you're gorgeous to me

metaphor • 28 January 2012 at 2:48 AM

"If someone's obese, on a scooter, ordering mcdonalds - I feel bad for them. I pity them. They're not helping themselves.
But, if you work out, if you can walk up stares without getting winded because you're really out of shape - then you're gorgeous to me."

@cafe

Yes, you...you make sense!
You said the smartest thing regarding weight I've heard in a while.

I wish people would remember that there is more to health than weight. It's possible to be thin and not take care of yourself, it's possible to be fat and not take care of yourself.

sprite • 28 January 2012 at 7:38 PM

You know I have been on both side of the spectrum. I was really skinny growing up and people still told me I needed to lose weight. When I had trouble losing the weight after my daughter people acted like I was an Alien from another planet. Then would comment but you used to be so skinny. The same people who told me back then to lose weight before kids lol

I was a size 4/6 when I was a teenager.before kids now I am a size 10. After my daughter I was a size 14. Through it all my SO loved me no matter my size, my kids loves me, even at size 14 I had guys who found me attractive and asked me out. I am very curvy tho when I am a size 14, it's a nice curvy. That my SO preferred but I like being in between not a 4/6 not a 14 10 is comfortable for me.It's all relative.

What are you comfortable with and what will you love?