How am I supposed to do this? :/

whispers • 8 August 2012 at 4:31 PM

My mom was telling me today to be outgoing and talkative. I'm quiet and shy (in the RL at least). My mom told me to be confident and not care what others think. I don't know how to change myself.

I am quiet and shy. I am not the one to talk to people. And I've been like that for 13 1/2 years. And it's now that my mom tells me to change myself ;A;
How am I supposed to change something that's been the same for that long? T^T

meixiaotian • 8 August 2012 at 4:35 PM

Your mom should live with the fact that you aren't like that. You don't need to change.
However, if you want to, try being a bit more bold with people you're really comfortable with. It'll help you to start out.

daffyduck3500 • 8 August 2012 at 4:36 PM

It's hard, but possible. Watch a marathon of movies where the unpopular chick becomes popular and just do what they did. Step out of your comfort zone, talk. A lot!
Do something unexpected! I should write an advice column! hmmm..... hope this helped! @whispers

whispers • 8 August 2012 at 4:46 PM

@meixiaotian
I think she wants me to change for the best. Because I'm just like the MLP Fluttershy in the beginning of this episode. www.youtube.com/watch?v=USpYswlR6Xg

metaphor • 8 August 2012 at 5:05 PM

@whispers

As someone who is much the same way, I can say that I've been through much the same. My mother will try to get me to interact with people and sometimes I will get offended, thinking she's trying to get me to be someone I am not and will never be. But in reality, she is just trying to make me more happy and comfortable in social situations.

So maybe your mom is doing something similar, pushing something on you that you don't agree with thinking that it's what you want. Maybe try telling her how you feel? It worked for me.

lonewolf • 8 August 2012 at 5:45 PM

@whispers

I'm the same way. Don't try to change it- it'll come later on. I used to be SUPER shy and quiet and now I'm growing out of it. I'm like crazy wild with my best friends but with other people and aquaintences I'm mellow and quiet. Are you just like that with strangers and aquaintences?

solaris • 8 August 2012 at 6:07 PM

@whispers

It sounds like you might be introverted. Like me.

If that's true, I suggest that you read this article.

http://briankim.net/blog/2007/10/top-5-things-every-extrovert-should-know-about-introverts/

I found it really enlightening and it made me feel better about myself. 😊

goku • 8 August 2012 at 6:14 PM

@whipers I am the EXACT opposite most people have to TELL me to shutup xD

Just talk more around people. That's what I do xD

whispers • 8 August 2012 at 6:25 PM

@goku
LOL, that's literally my sister XD

But I don't like to talk around people ;A; I'm afraid I'll mess up >.<

@solaris
I don't think I'm an introvert >.<
I'm just like really shy and quiet, and I'm not shy with my friends. But when I'm with different people (even some of my relatives) I clam up ;A;

goku • 8 August 2012 at 6:28 PM

@whispers I mess up words sometimes! And they laugh! I laugh to 'cause it's funny. Once I said Plaje instead of plauge xD

whispers • 8 August 2012 at 6:30 PM

@goku
I mess up all the time and I sound weird >.< I sound like a guy ;A;
And I'm just afraid of the criticizing >,<
I already thought of as a "odd" person at my school ;A;

clayosaurusrex • 8 August 2012 at 6:31 PM

@whispers Talk to people you wouldn't normally talk to. It worked for me. Like, say, someone popular. Just talk. You are both human. If others see you with the popular person, and talk to you, talk to them too. You will gradually become more outgoing.

goku • 8 August 2012 at 6:37 PM

@whispers I sound like a girl☹️

That's what's really sad~

Most ppl at my school are mean and insult me for having curly hair, but really I couldn't care less of what they think of me~

whispers • 8 August 2012 at 7:25 PM

@goku
There is this girl who bullied me for two years >.<
Now I'm scared of what everybody thinks of me DX

@clayosaurusrex
Who should I talk to if all the populars at my school are jerks o.o

goku • 8 August 2012 at 7:57 PM

@whispers

I've never been bullied, so I don't know how bad that is. Because if someone was bullying me for a long while, I would have punched them. In the face.

Most people bully over jealousy. Maybe she is Jealous of you secretly 😸

whispers • 8 August 2012 at 8:00 PM

@whispers
Maybe .A. Cause she is hated because she's a jerk .A.
But I am still scared of what people think of me. Even on here oAo

clayosaurusrex • 8 August 2012 at 8:28 PM

@whispers Try to be friends with them. You never know why they are jerks. Maybe they are having problems at home. Kill them with kindness.

whispers • 8 August 2012 at 9:47 PM

@claysaurusrex
I guess I'll try >.<

stellie • 8 August 2012 at 9:51 PM

@WHISPERS

OMG! MY MOM JUST TOLD ME THE SAME THING, AND IM THE SAME AS YOU! I know how it feels... Im shy and sort of quiet... Mostly Shy, but quiet as in O dont talk to anybody if I dont know them...

whispers • 8 August 2012 at 9:58 PM

@stellie
Wow, I'm shocked that I can relate to several people on EC. But you and me are like twins on this XD