Could use a bit of advice here

celeste • 29 March 2013 at 3:21 AM

OK, I'll start with my story:

I've got a scholarship to a private school in Australia (OK, fair enough) and the other scholarships are, like me, all Asian (Fair enough too).

However, their attitude towards me became kinda... *enueghhh* and after a while, I just left. But, lately, we're kinda becoming a bit better when it comes to social terms, but, since then, I've already got another group.

It felt like, when I left them, I left the Asians entirely, and now they no longer consider me, well, 'Asian'. Like, there were 2 parties this year where practically EVERY ASIAN was invited EXCEPT for me (including the Scholarships).

By no means am I on BAD TERMS with the Scholarships (anymore) or the Asians, so I just DON'T GET IT.

JUST BECAUSE I HAVE NON-ASIAN FRIENDS DOES NOT MEAN I HAVE COMPLETELY DUMPED WHAT IS CONSIDERED TO BE MY CULTURE COMPLETELY, GAUSH.

I feel so left out when my Asian friends (inc. Scholarships) discuss Asian-y things with THEIR Asian-y friends.

And the worst part is that I thought I was the one who had a social life. I mean, one just lectured me about 'making more friends' while I stood there making inhuman noises. They're the ones who insisted they bunch together like buddy-buddies and THEN join the Asians. Yep, sorry for saying, but they're the ones who refused to associate with the other schools whilst I made friends with them AND still chat with them on Facebook.

Seriously. It ANNOYS ME TO NO END.

But then again, I wonder if I'm being irrational.

jix • 29 March 2013 at 3:31 AM

@celeste

They probably thought you were a wannabe. Like those Asians that just want to NOT be Asian so much that they abandon all their Asian friends and stick with others.

Although I'm not exactly sure how to deal with this, maybe start off by giving an extra minute just to drop by and say hi, chat a bit about Asian-y stuffs? Something like that.

ems • 29 March 2013 at 3:34 AM

@celeste

Actually, you aren't being irrational, it's the Asians who are ignoring you(?) are being irrational. Just because you have non-Asian friends does not mean that you've dumped your Asian friends. I'm cockasion (spelling fail D: ), and at least half my friends are Asian. XD None of their Asian friends are angry because of them having white friends. It's kind of racist really. 😋 (Sorry if that's not what's irritating you.... I got lost. XD) I can totally see what you're kind of saying. ^^' I have a group of friends that all ply soccer together--I don't--and all they talk about at lunch is what happened at soccer and about people I don't know. ;-; So I don't sit with them much anymore. 😋

celeste • 29 March 2013 at 3:35 AM

@jix

Hm, thanks for that! I was considering this to be a possibility as well, since the friends I made were most certainly non Asian. In fact, if I talk to them around Asians, the Asians DO give me a LOT of weird stares.

(I don't get it, why are Asians always lumped together?)

Maybe I'll try that!

@ems

I'm still kinda worried that maybe they're not REALLY ignoring me and I'm just overthinking things (who knows? Maybe they just don't see me as a friend like I see them). Well, they kinda DO have Caucasian friends, but they just exchange words every so often - like, not to the same extent with my friends.

I kinda want to be friends with the Asians, but I often don't think that's a good enough reason for dumping some of my non-Asian best friends.

tikimaki • 29 March 2013 at 3:55 AM

@celeste
I would say try to spend sometime with them. Even if you are part of another social group try at least talk to both? Just a possibility.

Also this is kinda off topic, but where in Australia?! 😃

jix • 29 March 2013 at 4:20 AM

@celeste

XD No prob. I'd know - the Asians at my school are just, like, troopers. They NEVER leave each others' sides. I'm just like... Caucasian's are okay. =.="

ems • 29 March 2013 at 4:34 AM

@celeste
You could be over thinking things... I dunno though, since I wasn't there or anything. ^^' But it may not be racial either, maybe it's not because they don't like Caucasians, maybe it's just that they like their Asian friends more. It may just be that the Caucasions don't understand their Asian stuffs.. Probably not though. I can't really be sure what it is, since I have friends of like... Every single race, and we all understand each other just fine. Customs and stuff. XD I'm not even old enough for a scholarship... So I have know idea how people your age think either. And you shouldn't dump your besties for a group of people. :/ Best friends are really hard to find. Especially the ones that respect your opinion, values, etc.. Are the Asians good people?

snowrosehell • 29 March 2013 at 5:12 AM

@celeste - For me well, I don't know if you're being irrational or what. But here's my opinion. Actually there's nothing wrong with making friends with other people who had different culture. Seriously, that's like being irrational.

If a person is really a smart one then, one shouldn't be as what you say "DUMPED" just because of what they think. They must be reasonable enough. I don't think you've dumped you being Asian-y. It's fun when you have friends who had different culture and nationality. I'm not quite sure of what to say to you since my head is all messed-up. XD As for me, I haven't experienced that so far. I have friends I go to who are Asians and not even in school. But we get along just like normal people, seeing each other like there's no difference. And I agree with ems there. True friends whom you can call Best friend is really hard to find. You shouldn't stick around much with people whom you think aren't true.


@ems - To answer your question, it's a yes. If you say Asian that's like a broad term. Asia is a large continent with many different countries. If some people are rude and lives in Asia but in a different country, you can't consider Asians as bad people. There maybe some who aren't (Just a few people). But mostly, they are good people.

ems • 29 March 2013 at 5:14 AM

@snowrosehell Well I knew that. XP I just wanted to know if the specific people Celeste was talking about we're nice. But thanks anyways. ^^"

ems • 29 March 2013 at 5:14 AM

.... Yea... No idea. O___O

snowrosehell • 29 March 2013 at 5:16 AM

@ems - I'm quite curious on that too. I haven't tried what she had experienced though.>.> Heyy, how did you do that? xD

ems • 29 March 2013 at 5:24 AM

@snowrosehell Dunno. XD It happens periodically when I use an iPad. O-o Yeah, I've never been in that position before.. So I'm not sure how I can help. XP

snowrosehell • 29 March 2013 at 5:29 AM

@ems - Oh lol. But, you had friends like the ones she had right? (Not speaking about the attitudes though xD). Luckyy! My mom won't get me an iPad. T^T

ems • 29 March 2013 at 5:32 AM

@snowrosehell Sort of. Friends who play soccer... Um.. Friends of pretty much every race. 😋 Oh, it's not mine, it's my mom's but I play with it a lot. cx

snowrosehell • 29 March 2013 at 5:40 AM

@ems - Ohhh. haha. I also have friends who play soccer! Oh well, I hope she fixes her problems and worries soon and so as mine. xD Lol