kind if clingy friend

crazyfeline • 27 May 2016 at 8:49 AM

So I have a clingy friend.
She's like my second best friend and we've been friends for 10 or so years.
We hang out so much.
Then when I'm hanging out with another friend, she's like "where was my invite?"
I'd never hang out with a group and not invite her as I see that as exclusion, but when its one or two friends I'm with. :/

I'm going to the movies with a friend Sunday to see two movies. The cinema is an hour away.
I mentioned I was going and she said "where was my invite?"
We've been to see two movies this year, I haven't been once with this friend.

Whenever she's hanging out with another friend I don't crack it. I don't care. I'm a fairly social person so its getting annoying. She asks to hang out about every day we both have a day off, and I'm always happy to but some days I have plans. And I'm not going to get all secretive and pretend I'm not hanging out with other people, because that isn't what I'm like.

I don't really know what to do?
Ive said things like "its not like I'm excluding you. I am allowed to hang out with others without you.."
And at the time she'll just reply with "whatever" or something and ignore me then apologise a day or two later.

I know it sounds like a ridiculous friendship, but we are really good friends and it just irritates me that every time I'm hanging out with someone else she gets jealous or something.

Advice?
Or am I actually in the wrong?
:/

iceiceice • 27 May 2016 at 11:18 AM

@crazyfeline
I don't know the full story, but base on what you told me, you're right, she doe sound a little clingy.

You said you known her for years, right? Does this mean this happened (clingingness) recently?

If it's the first time it happened, there my be a chance there is something going on in her life. If this common, I suggest you might want to cut her out.

raccoon • 27 May 2016 at 12:52 PM

@crazyfeline

Ice offered some good advice.

If it turns out that there is something going on in her life, don't push her too hard to share. Just let her know that you're there if she needs to talk.

You are definitely not in the wrong here, you have every right to go hang out with other friends.

crazyfeline • 27 May 2016 at 8:06 PM

@iceiceice @raccoon
Thank you guys ❤️

Its only happened this year/end of last year..
As far as I know nothing is going on since whenever something is she tells me. :/
It could be that now we've all finished school she's afraid of everyone drifting apart and just losing friends or something?

Is there a way I could ask what's happening in a polite way? O.o
Because I don't want to sound like I'm trying to be rude and upset a friend..

raccoon • 27 May 2016 at 8:42 PM

@crazyfeline

That could be it. I would just say something along the lines of "Hey, is everything ok? You've been acting a little differently lately and I was wondering if something was bothering you."

As long as you aren't aggressive with how you say it I highly doubt you'll seem rude.

crazyfeline • 27 May 2016 at 8:55 PM

@raccoon I'll give it a go! Something like that should come off as rude. Thank you!! 😊