MY HEART HURTS.

miomar • 5 September 2011 at 5:25 AM

Wow ='^0

feathershaft • 5 September 2011 at 5:28 AM

@lilliana Good luck, then. I just find it really stupid that your husband is do mean to you, and yet you are so loyal. He doesn't deserve your love, and you deserve better too. Keep up your hope-maybe everything WILL change for the better, however unexpectedly.

And I want to thank you too for widening my horizons-now I know that not everything is the same as the little piece of the world I know. I am soon traveling to Asia and I wish that more people there are like you than the ones who emotionally and physically abuse you.

smilies • 5 September 2011 at 5:42 AM

@lillia You need to get away from your mum too ☹️ Do you think you could not tell her where you are going or something?

lillia • 5 September 2011 at 5:43 AM

@feathershaft
I am stupid, maybe me and he is stupid. I actually do know that he loves me, from the way he acts. Everyday after we fight, he would kiss my hand and says sorry. I love you. Sometime, unexpectedly, he would buy sushi and say, "surprise~~~~!!" and make this stupid happy face as if like he believes that everything is going to be okay and will makes me soooooo happy. And seeing him like that, even though hes dumb, makes me very happy, that he's actually trying something nice lol it makes me forget and forgive, I think what he need to have is for him to be aware of the future. Been trying to change him for 8 years now, but I do see a little progress. He dosnt take my money anymore. Not sure how long it takes, but this is one of the big progress I think..
I don't know though..8 years was too long and he change only 15%..

Thank you too, for being patient and to hear me out crying like a mad person..xD

smilies • 5 September 2011 at 5:45 AM

@lillia Oh, it's good to hear he's making progress... 😊 I dunno then....

lilliana • 5 September 2011 at 5:50 AM

@opal_dream
Thank you for the beautiful words you just gave me!
I agree, love do hurts even if it's right or wrong !
I like that word..*stores in my brain cells*

@smilies
I was thinking about that too!!
But I think they might get really worried if I do such thing.
I really wish to go away wout telling everyone. But I'm also worried because they might get sick being overrworried, she's too attached to me, like a busybody person, so I don't think she could bear that loneliness :L
But i was really thinking about it, I might be successfull starting everything by my own, and forget all the past, It seems refleshing

smilies • 5 September 2011 at 5:53 AM

@lillia The last person I'd stay for is your mum, from what I've heard it would do her good 😋
If you put your mind to it, you can achieve anything 😊 Just think about it, and what you want from life, and where you want to be in say, 10 years 😸

feathershaft • 5 September 2011 at 5:55 AM

@lillia You're not stupid, just following your heart instead of your mind. Maybe you will be the one that changes him into a better person. Be strong in everything you do and that will gradually affect him. It takes time to understand other people. Have faith in yourself, dude.

lillia • 5 September 2011 at 6:03 AM

@smilies
*smiles* I want.. To be a singer!! XDDDDDDD
I know I can, there were also a Japanese guy who really wanted to help me!!..it was too late though..
And one of the producer wants me to sing aswell, but he need money first..but that means I still have a chance, I'm ATM doing something , like making a commercial song, because one of my friend is helping me out, but my archievemant is when I get on the stage, sing a cheering song for the people who suffered in life, and hope to spread message to stop wars all over the world! I hope god will hear my prayer, one day ..

@feathershaft
Thank you, I will try!
I still have a hope, not really strong as before, but if I've been that far, I think I can try more.

smilies • 5 September 2011 at 6:16 AM

@lillia ... I'm an atheist X) But I believe in you 😊 I'm sure you could make it, it's never too late! 😸

lillia • 5 September 2011 at 6:19 AM

@smilies
Thank you! :,D *hugs hugs*
Buy my CD if I get xDDDD

smilies • 5 September 2011 at 6:22 AM

@lillia Definately! 😉

Deleted • 6 September 2011 at 2:08 AM

Same!