I feel like a fool.

lavender • 20 February 2012 at 5:31 PM

@dreamer
Same situation here! And, I think you are a great person!😃

dreamer • 20 February 2012 at 6:01 PM

@Piucca LOL! I'm flattered. 😋

@Cafe I could always use more information, but if you don't want to say then s'all good. X3

cafe • 20 February 2012 at 6:06 PM

Here's what I think about you, with all honesty


Good;

When you believe in something, you push the point. You don't let someone walk all over you. In the right situation, this is phenomenal thing. You seem to always put a smile on my face, when I'm feeling down. From as far back when I can remember, even on thepells4, you'd notice I was down and start joking about nothing to try and cheer me up. You are a caring person, and will go out of your way to try and lift someone's spirits.


Now, the bad;

As I said, you push your point. In the wrong situation, this can and usually ends up bad. When you make posts like this, you make it seem the world is ending. When in all reality, it isn't that bad. Sometimes you're too harsh and a tad bossy to others.



The bad can easily be fixed, and I don't want you to take anything I said with venomousity. I am not looking down on you in any way.

dreamer • 20 February 2012 at 6:24 PM

@Cafe Again, thank you for the honesty. 😊

Replying to:

Good;

I've never liked feeling vulnerable, so I hide it by trying as well as possible to prove a point, no matter what happens. I actually enjoy making people happy just to see people react in a positive way. I've always cared for others. When I was little, I'd always be the one to sit and rub someone's back when they're hurt, that sort of relationship.

Bad;

As I said, I don't like feeling vulnerable. But all I'm doing is making people afraid to talk to me. In reality, I'm actually extremely shy, sensitive. I act harsh so people don't use my qualities against me. I mainly do this because I'm always making myself feel liek the end of the world because... Well, it's like these two little people living inside of me. The one that reacts to everything, and the other that's obsessed with smacking the other in the face. So I always seem to think that nothing will turn out good for me. So I overreact a lot. If I'm bossing anyone around, from the bottom of my heart I never mean to do it to anyone. Sometimes I tell myself that people should just learn a lesson; I say what's on my mind just so people know what others feel, and so that no one calls me a liar again. (long story)

I can try to fix all of it. But I'm not good at fixing things. Any things. Like, I could use water to burn a piece of paper.

But, there always is effort...

cafe • 20 February 2012 at 6:36 PM

Salright 😸


Ahh. I hate inner conflictions. I loathe them

kagirl21 • 20 February 2012 at 6:44 PM

@dreamer. You're right...you're great at keeping secrets! 😃 That's one of the things I love about you, Dani! I'm terrible at keeping secrets (you know that xD) and sometimes I wish I could be more like you. 😊 So don't feel bad for yourself like that. (; I think you're nice and funny. And most importantly you're honest. 😋

dreamer • 20 February 2012 at 8:15 PM

@Kagirl21 I've always been pretty good at keeping secrets, yeah. 😋 The only secrets I can't keep our my own personal secrets (I think you know that X3).
I like being honest because when I was in the third grade... I was like, a filthy liar. O_O My aunt got in a fight with my parents and she was screeching and calling me a liar. I was under the table, crying my eyes out. (Can you not tell anyone about this? XD) I mean, I was only 9, maybe 8. And all this emotional crap was starting. 😋
Plus, my sister is always aimed on humiliating me. She like, lies about me to make me seem like a freak. And I think you've experienced this, Samantha always taunts me about my... *looking down* XD
I never thought of myself as nice. Because I stress a lot. And people aggrivate me. xD But 'he' told me I was nice. 😊 And I'm funny. People laugh at my jokes. xD I'm pretty open about myself.

kagirl21 • 20 February 2012 at 9:38 PM

@dreamer At least your sister doesn't go on top of you during sleepovers at like 1:00 in the mourning. XD That was just wrong. 😋 I think 'he' is happpy for someone liking him because I don't think anyone has thought of him in that way before. I think only one other person..

toy • 20 February 2012 at 10:14 PM

I don't know you.
But you type like you're 20,
when your like 11? o.o;
Super smart(;

dreamer • 20 February 2012 at 11:17 PM

@Kagirl21 Haha, that was hilarious. xD Remember what she whispered in your ear? SO... Omg. O_O
Yeah, I guess you're right. Like, everyone else hates him. X3 It's kinda sad, actually.
I'm going to tell him at the dance. March 8. Like, I'm not even gonna hold it off anymore. I think he'd be happy. 😊
What one other person...? O.o *is listening*

@Toy Haha, I type like that on purpouse. 😋 In real life, some people used to say I looked younger, now they think I look so much older.
I'm 12, btw. But I do wish I was older. xD

kagirl21 • 25 February 2012 at 10:09 PM

@dreamer I remember in 3rd grade we was really good friends with this girl that moved the year he went to Switzerland. They were neighbors and they were really good friends. I think she liked him.

dreamer • 25 February 2012 at 10:15 PM

@Kagirl21 Ehh, I dunno. I wouldn't worry. If she moved, then... I don't have to worry. X3
I just want to be nice to him too. Since anyone who's "friends" with him just insults him behind his back about all his mistakes. I've heard it, and it's awful. >_< I don't think he knows about it.
So I don't know how to reach out, but I want to. I think he's happy about knowing how I feel... Since he truly found out he's seemed a little closer. He kept trying to start a conversation wtih me at Enrichment last Friday. 😊
He thinks of himself a little too highly sometimes, so it might make him happy that *someone* likes him. A lot. That's just how I see it. xD
Maybe I really do have a chance. I'm going for it. 😊

kagirl21 • 25 February 2012 at 10:17 PM

@Dreamer I think he has anger for this one person. In 3rd grade they got on to a bug fight on the soccer field and Ban cried and the kid ended up in the principal's office with him. You might know who he is..

dreamer • 25 February 2012 at 10:21 PM

@Kagirl21 Who? 😱 I've never heard about that. I've seen him cry before, though.

At music class a month or two ago Nassim was practically bragging about many times he could make Ben cry. It ticked me off. >.< Honestly, I hate Nassim. He thinks he's so awesome, acting like a jerk when he's really just a loser. :/ He made fun of my group when we were performing our rap at S.O.S. too. I hate him soooooo much.
Anyways. We're not talking about him. But you know. xD

kagirl21 • 25 February 2012 at 10:24 PM

@Dreamer It was Connor. They got into a fight and I know this for a fact because Ben got in a fight with him in 3rd grade (in my class that year) and in 4th grade Connor (in my class that year) always talking about him cocky. And I have Art with both of them and they always seem they have some tension between them.

dreamer • 25 February 2012 at 10:29 PM

@Kagirl21 Aww, that makes sense. I don't even know Connor but he still annoys me. xD
I mean everyone is gonna hate SOMEONE though. I don't think I have that, like, rivalry with anyone, but... You know. XD
In the fifth grade Ben and his little group of "friends" (haha, barely) would argue one day, and the next day they'd be going over eachother's houses. I remember hearing the four of them running around outside on the street in front of my house screaming. It was crazy. xD
I kinda feel bad for him though. No one is really friendly to him. That's not why I like him or anything, but I just feel bad.

kagirl21 • 25 February 2012 at 10:32 PM

@Dreamer Yeah I know. But I remember in 3rd grade we would kinda take it out on people if something happened. Like he mostly on me because I sat next to him pretty much 2/3 of the year. Or at least very close to him. xD But I did feel bad.

dreamer • 25 February 2012 at 10:37 PM

@Kagirl21 This is how I felt about him last year:

First day I ever saw him: *.*
Two months later: Ehh.
Middle of the year: I hate him so much. >.<
End of year: You know what? Maybe he's not that bad...
Beginning of sixth grade: I hope no one thinks I like him or anything. I don't.
Half way through September: So maybe I was a little jealous...
End of September, early October (the day of our first filed trip, the one where we walked seven miles?): Oh no. I think I like him. >.< Omg. Why do I feel this way? *smacks self*
Now: ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️



XD

kagirl21 • 25 February 2012 at 10:38 PM

@Dreamer Wow. XD

dreamer • 25 February 2012 at 10:42 PM

@Kagirl21 Ikr? XD I'm such a fail. He's actually kinda nice though...
I thought he was a jerk. But he tries to be funny, he compliments me, he tries to talk to me sometimes. And I've noticed that whenver I talk, he listens to me and looks right at me when I say something. 😱
I don't know. What do you think of him honestly? Everyone I talk to doesn't like him much at all. xD

kagirl21 • 25 February 2012 at 10:44 PM

@Dreamer The only reason why have this opinion of him is because of the only memories I have of him. So I think he is a pushy and if you do something wrong..he will get pissed at you. (He did that to me in Outdoor Pursuits) But I know that if you get to know him very well we can be really funny and cool. 😊

dreamer • 25 February 2012 at 10:47 PM

@Kagirl21 I know. He used to get pissed off all the time in the fifth grade. xD He looks down aon people sometimes, but I can't really blame him for that... X3 I listen to some of the things he says at Enrichment, he says some weird things but he's actually really funny at the same time. I've always laughed a little.

kagirl21 • 25 February 2012 at 10:50 PM

@Dreamer I remember in 3rd grade when we did some pilgrim and native american thing before a song he coughed, *Father Crapper* XD And me and that girl that I thought liked him were like, "Ben!!" And of coarse I was next to him. XD

dreamer • 25 February 2012 at 10:51 PM

@Kagirl21 Wowwww. xD That's so something he would've done... But at least he's not boring like me. XDDDDD

kagirl21 • 25 February 2012 at 10:54 PM

@Dreamer True. XD JK !

dreamer • 25 February 2012 at 10:58 PM

@Kagirl21 He wouldn't say that now, but he would have. X3 Ehh. I am a boring person. Admit it. xD People don't get me. For a lot of reasons. 😋 But yeah.

I feel like my feleings for Ben is like the Carlos story all over again.

I start off hating him, then realise I'm jealous, then like him, and then... Well both the endings might end differently. But my ending with Carlos was not a happy one.

Your third grade here seems so... Interesting. XD Third grade seemed like a big year for me too. I'm not really sure why. I just didn't worry about anything, and my dad wasn't over-protective of me when I was little the way he is now. :/ That's what annoys me most.

kagirl21 • 25 February 2012 at 11:00 PM

@Dreamer Be yourself more often at school. Then you wouldn't be as boring. XD And remember this.....YOUR DAD DOESN'T NEED TO KNOW. XD

sarahsaurus • 25 February 2012 at 11:06 PM

@dreamer

Here goes the speach....

You are who you are. Things around you may be wanting to push you down, but you should always stand back up. In my honest opinion, I ENVY your cove! I ENVY your doovoo! If you feel stacked, like there is nothing for you to do now, then setbanother goal.😸 Dont worry about what others think, and tell them that. YOU ARE WHO YOU ARE! 😉

dreamer • 25 February 2012 at 11:13 PM

@Kagirl21 I curse. I text late at night. I sneak onto Youtube. I've made a life on the Internet. HE SHALL NEVER KNOW!
My mom understands that I act like this now, she was a girl like me one time. My dad wasn't. My dad is mad at himself and seems to take it out on me. >.< He never gets mad at my sister...
I'm starting to be who I am. I'm really trying. I want more friends, not more people to judge me and read me like an open book.
So if I face my fears, would more people have respect for me? If I was more open, would people enjoy me?
It just ticks me off. Meghan, in my learning group, purpousely acts like "La di da... 8D" and gets all the attention from boys. When I try to be funny, I get: *cricket cricket*. It makes me so mad.

kagirl21 • 25 February 2012 at 11:18 PM

@Dreamer You're dad just doesn't get this century. XD And if you were more open of coarse you would have more friends. 😊 I'm usually shy in class but then I get more, and more open people talk to me a lot. 😊