From 2015, but re-writen. WARNING VERY LONG!

sorrow • 10 March 2016 at 11:30 PM

This is a story from 2015, but I re wrote it because its almost exactly a year old, and I didn't like my style of writing when I looked back at it. The cringing was real.

All the creatures used in this story are:
Aadam
Annee
Balbusaur
Inferno
Stel-La

Just a reminder:
When I first wrote this, I made up the places my characters traveled. So don't yell at me if Gantulas don't live in Hollows or Garguaiths don't like in Gradens 😋

Key: ** means that time has passed.

Alrighty, now I, Teddy267, proudly (Sort of), present to you, Aadam.

Aadam was an unsual skunk. For one, his name was spelt weird, for two, he was a kind of skunk called a “Pinkunk.” Pinkunks are super smelly, and their fur is a bubblegum pink, with a long, feathery tail, and one big, dark black stripe down the top of its small head to the tip of soft tail. Another thing is that (like all creatures,) Aadam was an egg. Aadam’s parents were away, so they left Aadam with the next closest creatures they could trust, the Yeeps. Yeeps are wild little creatures. With one big eye, a blue nose, small ears. Dark red fur with little white specks, and a cottonball tail. There was a Yeep egg just about as old as Aadam. The little Yeep egg’s name was Stel-La, and even though they were both eggs and they didn’t really know each other, they always stuck together.
A few days later, Aadam’s parents returned and visited the Yeeps, talking about Aadam and Stel-La. Just as they turned their back, they heard a crack! Aadam had hatched into a beautiful, your Pinkunk, and right next to him, Stel-La had hatched, and they saw each other for the first time, not knowing what they would have to do together, not far in their future.
Stel-La had gone to her nest with her family, while Aadam walked off in the other direction with his mum and dad. When they were halfway there, a lonely skunk was sitting in the road. “Who are you?” Aadam asked. “I’m Annee, not spelt A-N-N-E, but spelt A-N-N-E-E. I’m a Peeyu, but I’m abandoned.” She sighed, looking down kicking up dirt in the road. “There, There, you poor creature,” Aadam’s mom walked over and patted Annee on the back. Aadam turned to his dad, pulled his best “Please???” face. His dad coughed, then declaired: “Annee, you’re coming home with us.”
Later that night, Aadam and Annee were playing tag in the grass infron of their house. “Look at how much fun Aadam and Annee are having together! He would be so lonel y without her!” Aadams mom turned to tell her husband. “We could invite Stel-La over instead.”
“But not all the time!”
Aadam and Annee slowed their playing. “Uh-Oh, Mummy and Daddy are arguing.” He whispered to Annee.
“Why did I marry you?” Aadam’s dad yelled out of the blue. Aadam turned just in time to see his dad’s face calm, his mum’s eye’s start to water as she ran inside, and his dad reaching out, trying to take back what he had just done. “I didn’t mean it! Come back!” As he ran into the house after her, dissapering into to house. Afew minutes later, Stel-La walked up next to Aadam as his dad walked past, saying goodbye. “Where are you going to go?” Stel-La asked, looking up at him. “Where she wants me to go,” he replied. “Far, far, away.” He walked into Mackatron skies, out of Pinkunk and Yeep territory. “Children, please come inside.” A call came from the porch.
When the tree got inside, they saw Aadam’s mum sitting at their birch twig table, with her head hanging low, tears slowly running down her face like a dripping faucet. Her usually pretty, happy face was now soaking with her salty tears, it clinging to her pitiful face. “I… I didn-t mean i-t,” She sobbed. “Its okay, Daddy didn’t mean it eather.” Annee assured her. “I kno-w it’s a horra-ble task, but plea-se go fin-d your Fath-er!” She wailed, more tears dripping off her face. “We will.” The three kids whispered together.
“Good Luck!” Aadam’s mom yelled after the three, waving from the porch, dabbing the tears from her eyes. They had a long, hard journey ahead.
**
“The map says were are where Daddy was about twenty four hours ago.” Annee said, throwing worried looks at the other two. She was the smartest of the group, though she was abandoned. They had been out for three days, and had traveld through Mackatron Skies, Pthail Forests, the Rosse Fields, and were now looking up at the towering, amazing, and beautiful Fiamma Volcano. “Who sent you?” A deep voice boomed sternly. When they looked down from the Volcano, they saw they were surronded like a fish in a shark tank, by the flaming, horse-like Fiammas. “Who sent you?” The voice asked again. “Were looking for our father,” Stel-La said, staring at the Fiamma who seemed to be in charge. Stel-La was the bravest of the group. “Well, there father.” She jabbed a paw at Aadam and Annee.
“Hmm… A fully-grown male Pinkunk?”
“Uh, yeah.”
“He was here about twenty four hours ago.” (Out of the corner of his eye, Aadam saw Annee cross her arms and smirk, for her calculations of when their dad had been here was correct) “You’ll never catch him walking. You want a ride?”
“Uh, sure, but how would we pay you back? What are your names?” Aadam uched into the conversation.
“If you get a ride, you’ll only need to know me and Flamores. I am Inferno.” Inferno informed them. “Yes. I’m Flamores, and we could use some of your fur. Who are you?”
“I’m Stel-La, that’s Aadam, and that’s Annee. You have a deal.”
“Alrighty, hop on!”
Aadam and Annee grabbed a ride on Flamorse, while Stel-La got Inferno all to herself. “Soooo whyyyyy doooooo youuuuuu needdddd ourrrrrr furrrrrrr?!” Aadam half-yelled. Everytime he tried to open his mouth, air wwould fill his mouth and cheeks, and he would look like a chipmunk with its cheeks full of nuts. “Because although we and our eggs are on fire, we do get cold at night.” Flamorse replied with the best of ease. “We’re great at making things, you know.”
“Ohhhhhh!”
“We’re almost there!” Inferno yelled from beside Annee and Aadam. “That was fast,” Annee said. Fiammas were fast as the flames on their bodies, but they never dropped a sweat. (Well, if they did, it would boil.) After a few more seconds of riding, Inferno announced their stop at the edge of Garguaith trees. They thanked Inferno and Flamorse, and gave them patches of their fur, (Stel-La had cut it off with a sharp stick.) and set off in search of their dad.
The three amigo’s were halfway through the thick, dark green, vine covered garden of trees when Aadam saw some vines swinging that weren’t swinging a few seconds ago. Stel-La had noticed it too. Stel-La still had her sharp stick with her, and she pulled it from behind her small ear. “Who’s there?” She called.
Silence.
“You better come out before I have to come get you, and it won’t be pretty!” She warned.
Silence.
“Going once.”
Silence.
“Going twice.”
Silence.
“Going-“
THUNK! Right infront of them laned a mangled figure. It slowly rose as Stel-La raised her weapon to strike the goopy, olive green, leaf covered beast. Stel-La was just about to impale the creature when it sprang up away from danger, and started to talk in a Happy-Go-Lucky British accent. “Good evenin’, Chaps! I was having a jolly good time swingin’ on vines, then I fell. I didn’t mean no harm, mate. I could help yall’, I heard what you said to Inferno. He was passing through here, rambling on about some chaps by the names of “Mum, Stel-La, Aadam, and Annee.” An odd fellow, if you ask me. He wouldn’t take my advice. He just wanted to walk. Vines are so much faster to travel on. He’ll probably get lost too, trees are much more handy that most creatures would think. He’ll be stuck in here for at least another day, maybe. Fancy a spot of tea? You could stay in my house at The Tree. Pleanty of room for you chaps to rest. You look very sleepy.” The creature sucked in a huge breath as Annee could finally ask what it’s name was. “I’m Balbusaur, the Garguaith, Ma’am. And you are?”
“Well, nice to meet you Balb! Can I call you Balb? (“Uh, no, you may not.” Balbusaur had said.) Anyway, I’m Annee, that’s my brother Aadam, and our close friend, Stel-La. We’re looking for our Daddy, He’s the Pinkunk you saw. He’s Aadam’s real dad, I’m adopted.” Annee smiled, eager to make a new friend.
“Alrighty! To The Tree, then?”

**

desolation • 10 March 2016 at 11:32 PM

“AHHHHHH!!!!” Annee and Aadam were screaming at the top of their lungs as they swung vine to vine, tree to tree, holding on for dear life. Stel-La and Balbusaur were laughing at their startled faces. After a few more swings, Balbusaur pointed out “The Tree.” “I never thought I would say this, but its so beautiful!” Stel-La sighed, her soft side taking over her usually tough, un-girly like mannor. “The Tree” was blankly the biggest, most grand tree in all of the forests. It was a healthy, lush shade of toad green, and it was swarming with Garguaiths. For some reason, a wild Luckmooe had gotten up into the tree, and was grazing, very slowly, on the leaves, clearing having the time of its life before the Garguaiths would notice it and take it out of their tree. When they landed in front of The Tree, Garguaiths were all over Balbusaur. She seemed very popular, with creatures all over, in a full three hundred-sixty degrees circle, were yelling a friendly “Hello!” or waving at Balbusaur. After some more walking, they reached a door with a big “B” carved into it. “Here we are, my humble home.” She said, pushing open the door. Inside was shockingly clean, even though it was made of mud and dirt. Everything was polished and organized, way too much space for one Garguaith. The living room looked like a modern living room, but it was made out of mud, stone, and twigs. The kitchen had plenty of space for partying and lots of different teas and leaf mugs were in the stone cabinets. The stove was made of mud, and the table chairs, refrigerator, and counter was made out of twigs. The master and guest bedrooms had one large compact block of dirt in a square with a soft leaf pillow on top. “The dirt is good for your skin, er, fur.” Balbusaur said matter-of-factly. The bathroom looked normal, but made completely of stone. “The water here is fresh dew from this very tree.” Balbusaur said. “Fresh.”
“Herbal tea? Lilypad tea? Anything you want, I’m sure to have it somewhere.”
“Got any pumpkin? Or a way to find dad?” Annee sighed.
“Herbal, please. Annee, calm down. We’ll find him soon enough.” Aadam said calmly. Stel-La just grunted. “Yeah right. Lilypad, please, no flies.”
“Sure thing! I’m on it. You guys need to relax, take a chill pill. Chillax. Calm yourselves.” Balbusaur said. Out of nowhere, Annee asked: “Will you help us find Daddy? You seem very smart, and you know your way around here pretty well. Plus, you’re funny, and that’s a good way to lift spirits when all hope seems lost. So, Balbusaur, what do you say?” Aadam and Stel-La’s jaws dropped as they turned to look at Annee with wide eyes. Behind them, a CRASH could be heard. Balbusaur had dropped one of her fossilized leaf mugs and it chattered on the ground. “Oh, yes please!” She said, bouncing up and down. “Then you’re in!” Annee said joyfully. Stel-La grunted again. “Well, then, tea, then rest…” Balbusaur whispered, then yelled: “Then ADVENTURE!” Making everyone jump, she laughed. “Haha, gotcha!”
They slowly finished their tea in silence, and walked to their rooms. When Stel-La, Aadam, and Annee woke in the morning, they were covered in dirt and had to take showers. Balbusaur, for some reason, had woken up perfectly clean. Stel-La was the most dirty, she had spent some time digging a little nest into her bed. Aadam was the next dirtiest, for he tossed and turned all night. The least dirty was Annee, who slept on the floor, but it was windy and the floor was made of dirt, and she hadn’t closed her window, thus letting the wind blow around dirt. She had woken herself up, choking on dirt. Ater all their showers, it was finally time to leave. Yet again, Balbusaur was surrounded by her neighbors, all saying goodbye.
**
They traveled through the Gantula Hollows, and were in the middle of Tasma forests when they saw a pink tail whip around a thick tree. Aadam and Annee turned to look at each other and whispered, “Dad.” Balbusaur came up with a plan. “I will fall infront of him, tell him what I told you, but I wasn’t lying when I met you guys. Stel-La, you come up behind him and knock him out. Anne, Aadam, you grab him and run the way we came. Me and Stel-La will catch up with you and help you carry him.”
“Good that.” Annee and Aadam said.
“I get to hurt someone? Yay!” Stel-La smiled her crooked smile.
Stel-La snuck up on Aadam’s dad when they saw Balbusaur start talking. “Good to see you again, Chap! I was having a jolly good time”-THUNK! Aadam and Annee raced from behind their hiding spot to pick up their dad. Balbusaur and Stel-La had to run to catch up with them. They were insanely eager to get home.
**
They turned and ran back through Tasma Forests, Gantula Hollows, took a forgotten path around “The Tree,” (So we, er, I, don’t get noticed.” Balbusaur had said.) took another ride on Inferno and Flamorse, (which was very hard, Stel-La and Aadam had to hold his unconscious father on a running horse.) jogged throught Rosse Fields, ran through Phtail Forests, ran even fasted through Mackatron Skies, and ran as fast as their little legs (Or roots, if you’re like Balbusaur.) would carry them into Yeep and Pinkunk territory, and at cheetah speed up to Aadam and Annee’s porch. Stel-La dropped her hold on Aadam’s dad, and slammed her little fists on the door like her life depended on it, almost knocking the poor, fragile, little door down. When Aadam’s mum opened the door, her eyes teared up, and she ushered everyone inside, crying “Oh, Aadam, Annee! Stel-La! I know you all would have a good use in this big adventure! I’m so glad too see you all in one piece! Well, I don’t know you, but I think you helped these kiddos greatly! Thank you!” She pulled everyone, including her still unconscious husband, into a tight hug. “Uh, Ma’am, could you, uh, please let me go? You’re kinda, uh, makin’ it hard for me to, uh, breath.” Balbusaur gasped for breath. “Oh, sorry, sweetie!” She let go. “What it your name, dearie? I must know!”
“I’m Balbusaur, Ma’am.”
“What a nice name, Hun’! Now let’s get your father into bed ‘till he wakes.”
A few hours later, he woke up.
“I didn’t mean to kick you out!” She sobbed, latching her arms around his neck, pulling him into a huge embrace, making her confused, tired, and loopy husband even more confused. After a minute, he finally was able to sigh: “I didn’t mean to leave, either,” and his mum laughed a little for the first time in the long week this whole adventure had taken. Aadam and Annee rushed up to the side of the bed. “Dad!” they yelled at the same time. He smiled and kissed them each on the forhead. Stel-La grunted. Balbusaur wasn’t there, he was making a new home in a tree, not far away from Aadam and Annee’s little house.

murfijs • 21 June 2016 at 5:55 AM

cool