THE Joke Club of All! #THEJC

ashlinnhi • 4 May 2014 at 4:58 AM

Wow all of these are great! XD
There was a Longhorn flying a helicopter with a flight attendant on board. Ten minutes later she crashed. The attendant asked, "What happened?"
She said, "I got cold so I turned that big fan up there off."

sakuravixen • 4 May 2014 at 5:17 AM

:'D That is so funny!

silverknight01 • 4 May 2014 at 8:46 AM

@ashlinnhi
xD

I just about wet my self becasue I was laughing so hard
(no kidding!!)
#THEJC

vespira • 4 May 2014 at 8:53 AM

I got one!

What's the best pet to get?

A boa constrictor! It will hug you THEN eat you.

XD

narvix • 4 May 2014 at 12:10 PM

@silverknight01 I think I'll join in 😊

I've got a long one.

A Chinese, Mexican, and Caucasian are on a plane when the pilot tells them that they need to lighten the load or else they'll crash. So, the Chinese throws out a bowl of rice, the Mexican throws out a pair of tacos, and the Caucasian tosses out a bomb.

At the airport, one of the passengers passes a crying girl. He asks her why she's crying. In reply, she exclaims that a bowl of rice landed on her head.

Continuing on, the same passenger passes a crying boy. He asks why the boy is crying and the child responds with a sob that a pair of tacos landed on his head.

Finally, the passenger meets an elderly man who is laughing hysterically. He asks why the guy is laughing so hard. In between gasps for air, the old man exclaims, "When I farted, my house blew up!"

alliainen • 4 May 2014 at 3:42 PM

@school600

They were swedish numbers because the man was then brainless xD As I said, in finnish jokes the swedish are the stupid ones 😃

_________________________________________

Joke for the day:

Blonde, Redhead and a Brunette were invited to a highclass party. But there was a challenge - the party was held in a building which had 100 floors, and to get to the party, you had to go through every floor, listen a joke, and not laugh. So, basically, there would be 100 jokes told and no laughing allowed.

The girls started their way up. At first everyone were able to keep their cool, but then at the 16. joke the Brunette laughed, and had to go home. Redhead and Blonde continued.

At the 33. floor the Redhead crumbled with laughter and had to return home. Blonde continued on all alone.

Then, when she was at the 99. floor, she started laughing hysterically. The man who was supposed to tell the joke on that floor, was baffled.

Man: ''Why are you laughing, I didn't even tell the joke yet!''

Blonde: ''Aaahahaha...I know!!! But I just understood the first joke!!''

___________

@narvix

Great joke XD

ashlinnhi • 5 May 2014 at 7:15 AM

@narvix Your in!! 😃 @alliainen LOL!
ANNOUNCEMENT!
Weeeeeeeee.... (heh heh) are going to have a JOKE CONTEST!!
However... the jokes must be at least PARTLY original. So like, you can have a joke from online with a bit of your own twist into it. Entries are open until the 31st of May, 3:00 am ECT
PRIZES:
3rd place: Eastern Jungles (uncommon)
2nd place: Lighthouse Travel (rare)
1st place: Mother's Day Smoothie (VERY RARE), and... a choice between Barthuggo the Barthug or Boronite the Borro. *Sorry, these aren't hatched, as I just got them both today :\*
*I will update the prizes*
ONLY ANYONE (in the club) CAN PARTICIPATE!! Sorry, but if you want to take part and you're not in it, you'll just have to. 😊

narvix • 5 May 2014 at 11:49 PM

@ashlinnhi
Ahhh!!! I'm not good with creating jokes :c but... I guess I could try...?

ashlinnhi • 6 May 2014 at 7:53 AM

@narvix You can use a joke that you found, but you have to add a little bit of your own thing into it.

alliainen • 8 May 2014 at 4:21 PM

@ashlinnhi @narvix @charm556 @silverknight01 @school600 @werewolf @xoxo5959 @windchill @cutiecupcake @olimpt @poe

Oi clubbers! Wake up, wake up 😃 I want some jokes!

Here is my entry for the competition:

Two blondes had left for a roadtrip.

The blonde driving looks at her friend in the passenger seat and asks her to see if the blinker is working. The trip will be long, so it would be important that everything works.

So the other blonde looks out the window and says: *
''Yes. No. Yes. No.''

I have heard this somewhere before, but I added my own content, so it would be valid, right? 😊
Question: Is it allowed to submit more entries than one? 😱

ashlinnhi • 9 May 2014 at 3:51 AM

@alliainen yeah, that ok 😊 hmm... you may submit up to 3 at the most.
ANNOUNCEMENT:
You can submit up to 3 entries (for the contest)

silverknight01 • 9 May 2014 at 9:00 AM

@ashlinnhi
sorry about that, I have RP's coming out of my nose!! anyways, I'll enter!

@alliainen
AND JOKES YOU SHALL HAVE!

alliainen • 9 May 2014 at 11:52 AM

@silverknight01
I understand... 😃
Lately I've been completely immersed in mangaworld... Ah ❤️


Here's a joke 😃 (not entrying it in competition, though, I'll find something even better for that ^^)

Little girl: "Why does your son say, 'Cluck, cluck, cluck?'"
Mother: "Because he thinks he's a chicken."
Little girl: "Why don't you tell him he's not a chicken?"
Mother: "Because we need the eggs."

ashlinnhi • 10 May 2014 at 12:47 AM

@alliainen lol 😋
There were 3 friends going to Disney Land. They had been travelling for a while and they came upon a sign that said 'Disney Land left'. So they turned around and went home.

silverknight01 • 13 May 2014 at 10:14 PM

What is Bruce Lee’s favorite drink? Wataaaaah!


How does NASA organize their company parties? They planet.


What kind of shoes do ninjas wear? Sneakers.


Two fish are in a tank. One turns to the other and asks “How do you drive this thing?”

*BUM bum tss*

xD

@ashlinnhi @narvix @charm556 @school600 @werewolf
(only five pings work at a time)

ashlinnhi • 14 May 2014 at 3:09 AM

hahahahahahaha (they're so lame. oh. um... i mean they're so funny) 😋
ALRIGHT HERE'S THE UPDATE FOR THE CONTEST!:
Weeeeeeeee.... (heh heh) are going to have a JOKE CONTEST!!
However... the jokes must be at least PARTLY original. So like, you can have a joke from online with a bit of your own twist into it. Entries are open until the 31st of May, 3:00 am ECT
PRIZES:
3rd place: Aurora Borealis (rare)
2nd place: Lighthouse Travel (rare)
1st place: Mother's Day Smoothie (VERY RARE), and... a choice between Barthuggo the Barthug or Boronite the Borro. *Sorry, these aren't hatched, as I just got them both today*
ONLY ANYONE (in the club) CAN PARTICIPATE!! Sorry, but if you want to take part and you're not in it, you'll just have to. 😊
Let's get cracking! 😊

appleblizzard • 19 May 2014 at 2:45 PM

Hey can I join?

Question: What is the difference between an Indian Elephant and an African Elefant?
Answer: About 30,000 miles!
XD XD XD XD 😋

silverknight01 • 19 May 2014 at 3:48 PM

@appleblizzard
lol!
*comedian high five!* /)

ashlinnhi • 20 May 2014 at 7:31 AM

@appleblizzard yup sure! are you in the contest?

sakuravixen • 24 May 2014 at 7:56 PM

@ashlinnhi @silverknight01 @alliainen @appleblizzard @narvix

I've got an entry! There's quite a few versions of this, so I'm making my own.

One day, the teacher told the boy to find spelling words as a homework. When the boy got home, he heard his mum on the phone saying:"Be quiet!" The boy went to his brother's room and the television was on. An ad was saying:"Yeah, yeah, yeah." Then, the boy went to his sister's room. There was an ad on television saying:"I'm a barbie doll!"

The next day, the teacher asked to boy if he had done his homework.
"Be quiet!" The boy said to the teacher. The teacher asked if he wanted to go the the principal's office.
"Yeah, yeah, yeah." The boy replied. The teacher then sent him to the principal's office.
"Who do you think you are?" Asked the principal.
"I'm a barbie doll!" replied the boy.

ashlinnhi • 24 May 2014 at 9:22 PM

@school600 Yay! First entry 😃 I've heard of that one, good job on remaking it! 😊

narvix • 25 May 2014 at 1:19 PM

@ashlinnhi @school600 @silverknight01 @appleblizzard @alliainen

This one isn't my entry:
A few old couples used to get together to talk about life and to have a good time. One day one of the men, Harry, started talking about this fantastic restaurant he went to the other night with his wife. “Really?”, one of the men said, what’s it called? After thinking for a few seconds the Harry said, “what are those good smelling flowers called again?” “Do you mean a rose? the first man questioned. “Yes that’s it,” he exclaimed. Looking over at his wife he said, “Rose what’s that restaurant we went to the other night?”
(Found it on a clean jokes website)

I'm going to try this as my entry (the original involves cockroaches):
So, two chimpanzees - Moe and Lim - were resting in a tree enjoying a meal of fruit. "Lim," starts Moe. "You know about that pride of lions near the treeline? Well, I went to go get some berries and I saw one of the lionesses cleaning her cub with her tongue."
Lim spits out his food, exclaiming, "Moe! Not while I'm eating!"

|D poor entry is poor.

appleblizzard • 25 May 2014 at 4:22 PM

Here's my entry:
i believe i can flyyy
got shot by the pizza guyyy
all i wanted was some onion ringggss
from McDonald's or Burgerkinggg
I believe i can soarrrr
mom slapped me in the grocery storeee
Even though im 24 I still got an imaginary dinosoarrrrr
I believe i can falllll
I tripped on a bouncey ballll

XD

another a real situation with me:
When people go underwater in scary movies, I like to hold my breath and see if I would have survived that situation.
I almost died in Finding Nemo.

another:
Police: where do u live?
Me: with my parents
Police: where does ur parents live?
Me: with me
Police: where do u all live?
Me: together
Police: where is ur house?
Me: next to my neighbors house
Police: where is your neighbors house?
Me: if i tell you u wont believe me.
Police: tell me
Me: next to my house

another:
I know 10 facts about you:
Fact 1: You are reading this.
Fact 2: You can't say the letter 'm' without touching your lips.
Fact 3: You just tried it.
Fact 4: You're smiling.
Fact 6: You're smiling or laughing again.
Fact 7: You didn't notice I missed fact 5.
Fact 8: You just checked it.
Fact 9: You're smiling again.

another:
Boy : Marry me.. ?
Girl: Do you have a house..?
Boy : No..
Girl: Do you have a BMW car.. ?
Boy : No..
Girl: How much is your salary.. ?
Boy : No salary.. but,..
Girl: No but. You have nothing.. How can i
marry you.??
Leave please.!
Boy: (talk to himself) I have one villa, 3
property lands, 3 Ferrari, 2Porsche.. Why I
still need to buy BMW.?! How can I get the
salary when actually I am the BOSS

BTW, not all of these r my entries. Just wanted to make you laugh so yeah!

barbyka • 25 May 2014 at 4:43 PM

I've got one 😊 I love animal jokes and would like to share it...

2 sloths are hanging on a tree.
One week passes...
The second weeks passes...
On a 3rd week one of the sloths moves an inch and the other says: 'Why're you in such a hurry?'

ariellenichols • 26 May 2014 at 1:54 AM

hi everyone my name is ariellenichols im 22 and im new here um just looking for some friends and maybe a seasoned player to show me the ropes

ashlinnhi • 26 May 2014 at 7:21 AM

@narvix @barbyka @appleblizzard XD Great! @ariellenichols Um... sorry I'm not so sure what you mean by "ropes?"

narvix • 31 May 2014 at 8:02 AM

How are winners picked? Is it a group vote or is it a decision that you make? @ashlinnhi

ashlinnhi • 31 May 2014 at 8:14 AM

SO SORRY FOR THE DELAY! D: Here are the final decisions:
3rd: @school600
2nd: @narvix
1st: @alliainen
Congrats to the peeps who won, and great jop to everybody else! The prizes will be on the way!
Allie, which egg would you like?

narvix • 7 June 2014 at 1:09 PM

@alliainen @school600 Congrats guys ^^
@ashlinnhi Thanks for this 😊 This was kind of fun really.

ashlinnhi • 7 June 2014 at 8:15 PM

@narvix You're welcome 😃 Glad you enjoyed it!